Implications of Public Display of Affection Essay

II. Definition of PDA â€Å"Public Display of Affection or PDA as they are called, is the act of two people indulging in an intimate act in public.† [] It is an act that is mostly objectionable to the public. Today, Public Display of Affection is something that most couples indulge in the beginning of their days of physical exploration and discovery. â€Å"PDA is the physical demonstration of affection for another person while in the view of others. Holding hands or kissing in public are commonly considered to be unobjectionable forms of public displays of affection; however, what is considered objectionable depends on the context and social norms. For example, in places such as bars, nightclubs, and strip clubs, more extreme forms of public displays of affection are rarely considered to be objectionable.† [] â€Å"Public display of affection depends on the decision of the couple. Individual and societal views on Public Display of affection vary significantly. Such displays may sometimes be considered to be in bad taste, while in some jurisdictions such displays may even be criminal. Depending on the social values and context, extreme forms of public displays of affection may be considered indecent exposure.† [] Affection is an important part of any relationship. It makes a person feel warm inside when someone of his resemblance or even love lets the person know how he or she feels. This feeling is best expressed behind closed doors. Kisses and physical connection are the tools people use to display their affection. These tools will effectively free their feelings and allow themselves to be close. A. Social views Public display of affection affects people in different ways and one should be mindful of the feelings that can be elicited by ‘carrying on’ in public. When a couple is feeling passionate they may be oblivious to the presence of people around them, but they may accidentally hurt someone. Someone who has just lost a loved one may find their public display of affection heartbreaking; a reminder of someone they can no longer kiss. Someone who has ended a relationship may find it agonizing as a reminder of the one that had gone away. Older people may find it annoying as their generation was more modest and saved serious affection for times when the intimacy could be carried further than just holding hands and kissing. Single people and lonely people will feel similarly as it will remind them of the fact that they are alone. A consideration of the kind of people around the place will save everyone from feelings of resentment or in some cases, embarrassment. We find that the heart of PDA is intolerance and insecurity. In conversations with people about why such sights bother them – or don’t bother them – jealousy is an interesting common factor. Those who are in relationships themselves are rarely bothered by other’s exhibitions of affection, even if they preferred to show their love in private. However, those who are not, especially those who have recently had a break-up, are morbidly horrified by any sight of love between other people. Although holding hands is considered sweet by most people, it is rarely considered acceptable to openly kiss someone passionately in public because it is not polite, and going further than that is illegal and a crime in some places especially in conservative countries like India. B. Psychological views Public Display of Affection (PDA) can either be approved or disapproved. A person’s perspective might be different from someone else’s view on PDA. As our society tends to do what we think other people approve of or disapprove of, for example, an aggressive couple stopped their behavior because it was not approved. Injunctive norms can make a major impact in someone’s behavior and change that certain behavior to create a positive behavioral change. Certain public displays of affection are appropriate in some places than others. For example, in a club more people are likely to see couples showing their affection, in contrast to family-style restaurants. This makes us think that people doing PDA become aggressive and in emotional outburst everytime they are with their partner. Also, the way that people think of PDA differs from each other and their views of doing it also differs from one another, regarding the civil status. III. Causes of PDA Public display of affection or PDA has pros and cons depending on where society one belongs or what culture one is in. Public display of affection may mean that one is proud of the other, but may not be acceptable to society. It may also mean that one is truly in love with the other or one has nothing to hide. He/she may have no fear of being caught by someone else. Public display of affection may convey bad meanings and not good for children to see. They might consider this act as normal and can be done by just anybody. A. Affection on either boyfriend or girlfriend : true love The love practiced by couples through PDA (Public Display of Affection) is merely a factual understanding between couples. It is biologically and psychologically necessary for lovers to express their feeling on their partner the way they are suited to. True love is an urge between a single couple and as long as it necessary, couples must express it to show the partner how much he/she loves this person. That way, the partner would feel that he/she is very special to that someone. But then, expression of true love through PDA must have its limitations. Though expressing love in public is an acceptable fact in our society, partners must realize that displaying their affection in public can cause other people to think of bad remarks about it. â€Å"Love has intrigued people throughout history. Its joys and sorrows have inspired different students of human interaction. Indeed, love is one of the pervasive themes in the art and literature of many cultures. Each of our own lives has been influenced in significant ways by love, beginning with the love we receive as infants and children. Our best and worst moments in life can be tied to a love relationship.† [] According to psychologist Robert Sternberg, there are three components of love using the triangular theory of love: intimacy, passion, and commitment. Different combinations of these three components result in different types of love. For example, a combination of intimacy and commitment results in compassionate love, while a combination of passion and intimacy leads to passionate love. These three components are seen in various combinations to evidence different types of love. According to Sternberg, there are eight types of love formed through the various combinations of the three components of love, they are: Non-love, Liking, Infatuation, Empty Love, Romantic Love, Companionate Love, Fatuous Love, and Consummate Love. The theory characterizes love within the context of interpersonal relationships. 1. Components of love According to Sternberg, the three basic love components differ with respect to a number of properties, including stability and conscious controllability. For example, the intimacy and decision/commitment components are usually fairly stable in close relationships. Once we develop feelings of intimacy for someone and become committed to the relationship we have with that person, these features tend to endure over time. The passion component, however, tends to be less stable and predictable. In addition, although people possess agreat deal of conscious control over the commitment that they make to a relationship, and even some degree of control over their feelings of intimacy, they usually have very little conscious control over the amount of passion that they experience for their partners. a. Passion Passion is the strong feeling of affection to the partner. â€Å"Passion is the motivational component that fuels romantic feelings, physical attraction and the desire for sexual interaction. Passion instills a deep desire to be united with the loved one. In a sense, passion is like an addiction, because its capacity to provide intense stimulation and pleasure can exert a powerful craving in a person.† [] Passion is when a person has physical attraction with someone and the desire to express himself sexually to them. Passion differentiates romantic love from other types of love. It is all about physiological arousal. Passion is the fastest of the three components, but it can be the first to fade in a long-term relationship. The passion component is motivational in nature and consists of the drives that are involved in romantic and physical attraction, sexual consummation, and related phenomena. Although passion takes the form of sexuality in many love relationships, Sternberg suggested that other needs (including the need for affiliation, for dominance over others, and for self-esteem) can contribute to the experience of passion. b. Intimacy Intimacy is the state of having close physical attraction with somebody. Intimacy tends to appreciate the partner. â€Å"Intimacy is the emotional component of love that encompasses the sense of being bonded with another person. It includes feelings of warmth, sharing, and emotional closeness. Intimacy also embraces a willingness to help the other and an openness to sharing private thoughts and feelings with the beloved.† [] Intimacy is the feeling of being close to someone. It happens when a person feels that they are sharing themselves with someone that is considered being intimate. When a person shares a bond with someone, that person gives and receives emotional support. Intimacy is present in many different types of relationships, not just romantic ones. The feelings between best friends could be called intimate but not mean anything sexual at all. The intimacy component of love is primarily emotional in nature and involves feelings of warmth, closeness, connection, and bonding in the love relationship. Signs of intimacy include wanting to promote the welfare of the loved one; experiencing happiness, mutual understanding, and intimate communication with the loved one; having high regard for the loved one; giving and receiving emotional support; being able to count on the loved one in times of need; sharing oneself and one’s possessions with the loved one; and valuing the presence of the loved one in one’s life. c. Commitment Commitment is the component of love which tends to be in the behavioral aspect of a person. â€Å"Commitment is the thinking or cognitive aspect of love. It refers to the conscious decision to love another and to maintain a relationship over despite difficulties that may arise.† [] Decision or commitment has two aspects. The first decision that a person loves another person and would be the short term aspect. The second decision is the commitment to form and maintain a relationship and would be the long term aspect rather. When relationships last a long time, commitment is playing a major role. People tend to choose a partner based on their similarities, attractiveness and whether or not that person would be interested in them. Needless to say, it didn’t work out mainly because the similarity couldn’t withstand the difference in age. The decision/commitment component of love is primarily cognitive in nature and represents both the short-term decision that one individual loves another and the long-term commitment to maintain that love. 1. Types of love Love takes many forms. Love exists between parent and child and between family members. Love between friends, known to the ancient Greeks as philia, involves concern for the other’s well-being. Lovers may experience some other additional types of love, like passionate love and companionate love. A relationship (whether romantic in nature, familial, or casual) may go through any or all of the eight classifications of love. a. Non-love Non-love is the absence of all three of Sternberg’s components of love. â€Å"Non-love does not contain any component of love. Non-love does not contain intimacy, passion, or commitment and is experienced through casual acquaintances such as therapists, teachers, neighbors, etc.† [] Love is the strong feeling of deep affection for somebody. Non-love in this case defines a feeling of emptiness, or in short no love exists at all. Non-love can be experienced during break-ups and with persons having third parties. This can affect someone’s perception of life and will be difficult to recover. b. Liking â€Å"Liking details a relationship based on intimacy, but not passion or commitment. The characteristic of Liking is having close, intimate friendships with no long-term commitment; an example of Liking is developing an intimate friendship with a neighbor, but because commitment and passion are missing if either neighbor moves away, the relationship is not maintained.† [] Liking/friendship in this case is not used in a trivial sense. A psychologist said, particularly Dr. Sternberg, that this intimate liking characterizes true friendships, in which a person feels a bond, warmth, and closeness with another but not intense passion or long-term commitment. c. Infatuation Infatuation is the absence of the two main components of love while existing in the presence of passion. â€Å"Infatuation is a relationship based on passion, with no intimacy or commitment. Infatuation is characterized by passionate attraction on sight, and an example of such would be a one night stand.† [] Infatuation is purely based on a person’s strong feelings of love, hatred, anger, enthusiasm, etc. Romantic relationships often start out as infatuated love and become romantic love as intimacy develops over time. Without developing intimacy or commitment, infatuated love may disappear suddenly. d. Empty love Empty love is love without the feeling and the bonding. This love is commonly seen among short-term unmarried relationships, in which the couple stays only because there is a responsibility. â€Å"Empty Love is a relationship based on commitment, lacking any intimacy or passion. An example of Empty Love is a couple staying in a marriage or relationship for the â€Å"sake of the children.† Empty Love is characterized by a lack of emotional warmth or heat of passion where partners tolerate each other because of a false sense of duty, obligation, or fear of change.† [] Empty love is characterized by commitment without intimacy or passion. Sometimes, a stronger love deteriorates into empty love. In cultures in which arranged marriages are common, relationships may begin as empty love and develop into one of the other forms. e. Romantic love â€Å"Romantic Love is a relationship based on passion and intimacy; however, it lacks commitment. Romantic Love is characterized by a couple who are emotionally and physically drawn to one another without the commitment of a long-term relationship. Romantic lovers look at each other through â€Å"rose colored glasses† not seeing each other’s flaws.† [] Romantic love bonds individuals emotionally through intimacy and physically through passionate arousal, but neither is sustained without commitment. f. Companionate love Companionate love is an intimate, non-passionate type of love that is stronger than friendship because of the element of long-term commitment. Sexual desire is not an element of companionate love. This type of love is often found in marriages in which the passion has gone out of the relationship but a deep affection and commitment remain. The love ideally shared between family members is a form of companionate love, as is the love between close friends who have a platonic but strong friendship. â€Å"Companionate Love is based on intimacy and commitment without the wild fire of passion. Companionate Love is characterized by a committed friendship and shared intimacy; an example of Companionate Love is a marriage whose passion has dwindled or a very close and intimate friendship that has survived through distance, hardship, and time.† [] g. Fatuous love â€Å"Fatuous Love is based on passion and commitment, but lacks intimacy. Fatuous Love is where passion and commitment are combined before true intimacy can develop; an example would be a marriage commitment based on passionate sex which over times loses its passionate nature, and since the couple didn’t share intimate conversations, goals, and dreams, the marriage is ended when it is realized the couple are not a good match.† [] Fatuous love is exemplified in which a commitment is motivated largely by passion without the stabilizing influence of intimacy. h. Consummate love â€Å"Consummate Love involves intimacy, commitment, and passion. Consummate Love is when a couple are perfectly matched in passion, intimacy, and commitment, and it is the ideal that most people try to achieve.† [] Consummate love is the complete form of love, representing an ideal relationship toward which people strive. Of the eight varieties of love, consummate love is theorized to be that love associated with the â€Å"perfect couple†. â€Å"According to Sternberg, such couples will continue to have great sex fifteen years or more into the relationship, they can not imagine themselves happy over the long-term with anyone else, they overcome their few difficulties gracefully, and each delight in the relationship with one other. However, Sternberg cautions that maintaining a consummate love may be even harder than achieving it. He stresses the importance of translating the components of love into action. â€Å"Without expression,† he warns, â€Å"even the greatest of loves can die†. Thus, consummate love may not be permanent. If passion is lost over time, it may change into companionate love.† [] B. Lust Lust is a large physical attraction for an individual, which is sometimes uncontrollable and completely unreasonable. Lust is often confused with love. Looking at someone lustfully invariably involves the powerful inward desire or instinct to share physical intimacy with that person. The inward desire of the mind for intimacy, need not be considered only in terms of excessive and inappropriate desire for sexual intercourse — although this is included.â€Å"Of course, there is no moral difference between sexual intercourse. If intercourse before marriage is sinful — and it is — then sexual gratification before marriage is also sinful. No one is exempt from the temptation to lust. Therefore, we must take every care to avoid harbouring impure thoughts by rejecting them whenever they first enter our minds.† [] â€Å"We must take every care to avoid setting ourselves deliberately into any situation where we know that we will be exposed to this or a similar temptation.†[] Sex drive is the another term for lust. â€Å"The sex drive (libido or lust) is characterized by the craving for sexual gratification; it is often directed toward many partners. In mammals, the sex drive is associated primarily with the estrogens and androgens, particularly testosterone, are central to sexual desire in both men and women. Studies of human sexual arousal show that specific networks of brain activation are associated with the sex drive.† [] Drives lie along a continuum. Some, such as thirst and the need for warmth, can rarely be extinguished until satisfied, while the sex drive and the maternal instinct can be redirected. Falling in love appears to be near the base of this continuum. For example, romantic love is considerably stronger than the sex drive. Since romantic love is a universal and powerful human mating drive, it must have evolved. 1. Sexual arousal In men and women, sexual desire can anticipate arousal. It is an arousal caused by direct genital stimulation. Direct genital stimulation is more powerful and quicker in men than in women. As a result of the reciprocity between desire and arousal and neurobiological overlapping, physiological signs of arousal are already in play. Sexual arousal, or sexual excitement, is the arousal of sexual desire, during or in anticipation of sexual activity. Things that precipitate human sexual arousal are called erotic stimuli, or colloquially known as a turn-on. Sexual arousal usually leads to physiological changes in the aroused person, some of which are pronounced while others are more subtle. â€Å"Given the right context, these may lead to the person desiring physical contact, including kissing, cuddling, and petting of the erogenous zones. This may in turn make the person desire direct sexual stimulation of those parts of their body which would normally be out of bounds, such as breasts, nipples, buttocks and/or genitals, and to sexual activity.† [] When a couple is sexually aroused with each other they tend to do on displaying their affection to their partner. The arousal is due to the rapid increase of the hormones and this is the reason for the strong sensation of the couple to display their affection in more intense than before. These intense affection may result to a more immoral and unethical practice of public display of affection (PDA). 2. Aggresiveness Aggresiveness is marked by combative readiness. Aggression or aggressiveness of any person indulging in PDA means there is a sexual activity he wants to.   Ã¢â‚¬Å"Sexual aggressiveness has biological, physical and emotional aspects. Biologically, it refers to the reproductive mechanism and the basic biological drive that exists in all species. Emotional aspects deal with the intense personal bonds and emotions generated between sexual partners by a sexual activity. Physical issues around sexuality range from purely medical considerations to concerns about the physiological , psychological and sociological aspects of sexual behavior.† [] The gender of the person is a factor that plays a big role in human aggression. It is evidently seen in males and females, proven by history. a. Men There is evidence that differences in socialization, cognition and personality may help explain gender-based disparity in rates of anti-social, as well as violent behaviors. Gender differences in cognition, socialization, and behavior may exist as early as infancy. Boys are more easily angered and depend more on inputs from their mother’s. Psychologists show that the ways which females and males are socialized affect their development. Males learn to value independence, while females are taught that their self-worth depends on their ability to maintain relationships. b. Women Females are considered less aggressive than males in a relationship. Men usually tend to be the more dominant in a relationship while women usually obey what the males want to do, but in our generation both males and females are considered to be the equal in every relationship. Girls are shielded by moral sense, which directs them away from harming others. The ethical sensitivity may counterbalance the effects of family issues. Females are known to display more self-control than males. Females are more verbally skilled, which is a skill that can help them in dealing with obstacles they may come across without reacting with violence. When girls are aggressive, they are more likely to hide their behavior from adults than males. Girls are expected to form closer relationships with their friends and share feelings, while boys tend to act out on their feelings in inappropriate ways. C. Influential factors 1. Media Most of the influence of the mass media on interpersonal relationships is the powerful influence of advertising. Commercial messages influence how people feel about themselves and their image to others. Commercial messages influence what a person’s expectations are about themselves, about others, about what their lives should be like. For most people, these expectations are usually unrealistic and for some, can be damaging to their self esteem which directly affects how they relate to others. 2. Other couples doing PDA So long as you practice discretion and engage in such activities in a tasteful manner, being affectionate in public should never be offensive to others. Just like a smile or laughter, this expression of happiness can also be contagious. To see other couples holding hands or exchanging a brief kiss in public often makes others get a warm and fuzzy feeling too. Hopefully, they pass it on. Sure, you may hear the occasional â€Å"Get a room† but those comments usually stem from others who are merely jealous of the happiness you two share and are likely to be missing something in their own relationship. 3. Reading of pornographic articles In attempting to support and strengthen relationships, the topic of pornography is one that must be addressed. This article is not to preach or evangelize, nor is it to discuss morality or ethics. It is however important that couples understand the possible ramifications of a phenomenon that may impact their relationship. As unpopular as it may be, this article is an attempt to shed light on what many couples may face as society becomes more accepting of increasingly graphic, stark, and violent pornography. 4. Emotional ties Couples usually have emotional ties between each other. It is a must because a person or a couple is in love. This bring much emotions in the individuals and creates a strong bind to that couple that would made them feel that the person they currently love is the one for them and they would feel 100% that they must be loyal to their partner and show the intimate love they can give to them as long as they felt the same love they are giving to them. This is the point where the PDA (public display of affection) becomes more intimate and intense, this brings to the mind of other people to be unethical and immoral but to the couple doing it PDA is a good presentation of how they partner. It is emotionally tied to them and expressed the love for them. There is nothing bad having emotional ties with your partner, as long as the person is having his limitations, it is good. Having emotional ties means that a couple is really at the peak of their relationship and it is natural to feel it beca use it is a part of being in-love. IV. PDA and relationship Most people say that they hate PDA and can’t stand the ones who indulge in these ‘perverse’ activities. But given an opportunity, no one would mind staring at an intimate sight unless they are being watched back. â€Å"Your partner should become to you someone very special, as the relationship between the both of you develops. But this special relationship can only develop properly and honorably when it is built upon a wholehearted commitment , and upon mutual trust and respect. Mutual trust and respect; however, cannot be engendered and developed apart from complete purity and honour — in body and in mind. Our conduct must always be above reproach.† [] â€Å"This is the basis upon which mutual trust and respect first germinates, and then begins to grow. When we have found the right partner, then this growth will flourish eventually into love: the pure, deep, satisfying and honourable love associated with trust, respect and the wholehearted desire.† [] â€Å"Trust and respect is the foundation the couple must lay, and upon which they must build as they seek to develop a relationship with your partner. This foundation must apply to all stages of courtship — from the first dates, right through to (and including) the period of engagement.† [] A. In a married relationship The exploration route of life that a married relationship takes depends on what the couple wants to experience together during their lifetime. There are some people who want children to enter married relationship while other couples choose to go childless and spend their lifetime traveling to exotic places, enjoying what the world has to offer. This proves that marriage is an â€Å"opener† of a new world, opening the way to mutualism and separates them to the rest. This means PDA is less but relationship is stronger. There are no inappropriate decisions to be made in a married relationship. Living a good life is a decision that is made by two people, and does not need the approval of the rest of the world in order to function properly. There are clergy, and guidance counselors that might be able to help guide a couple on their quest for a good relationship, but the journey starts with the two of them. This means that the couple knows each other fully and the two knows if there’s love binding them or not. Married couples indulging in PDA are only using it to notice that the partner’s presence is there. 1. Without children Married life is fulfilling in itself. Some couples want to have children in their lives, and some don’t. Those who decide not to, have a great oppotunity to live a fulfilled life, loving and providing for their spouse’s needs. Being married without children allows a couple to really get to know themselves in a more intimate level. The time and attention aren’t divided, allowing them to devote themselves more fully to their partner and to the things the couple enjoys together. But also, the couple must also limit their PDAs so that they can focus on all of their work. In a married life without children, a couple has an independent PDA. 2. With children A married relationship is a new setting that the couple find themselves in a new way of looking at life and coming to terms with each other’s perspectives. Getting into married relationship after a thoroughly enjoyable bachelor’s life takes time to settle down. By then, there is a tough decision of when to have kids. Doing PDA even when the couple has their son/daughter is a sort of sweetness in a home. It only makes the relationship stronger and more enjoyable. 3. With grandsons and grandaughters Parents often rely on parents to help raise their children in this confusing and complex world. Grandparents would do well not to squander the opportunity given to them. The PDA in this kind of situation is much more less, lesser than a married life with children. PDA now here is scarce, but the scarcity of your PDA is much more filled with love, with passion. On this peak of your life, being a PDA doer is like commitment, since the time you two got married and has gone strong through the years. â€Å"This proves that the major components of love is passion, commitment, and intimacy.† [] B. In a boyfriend / girlfriend relationship A girlfriend or a boyfriend is an individual with whom one shares a romantic relationship. He/she is your consultant to all things, a shoulder to cry on. Having PDA with your boyfriend /girlfriend is much more free, but liberal. Those couples do it for love, but because of being liberal, they deny the criticisms of people around them, yet, they only accept the compliments. 1. Adolescent relationships One of the most exciting aspects about going to school for an adolescent is also one of the most difficult: the possibility of romantic relationships. Teens may be idealized of a boyfriend or girlfriend as an attractive person with whom they can date, and develop an intimate relationship. Of course it isn’t always as simple as this. Adolescents always have a liberal mind and can do anything for curiosity. While teenage romantic relationships are difficult, they are a necessary part of growing up in our society, as in the process of ending a relationship as a teen. Parents are often concerned with their son/daughter’s reaction to a relationship ending. They are alarmed of the PDA they are doing. The loss of a relationship during adolescence is particularly difficult because of the high probability that these teens will see each other very often, whether they attend the same school or have the same friends. Seeing an ex boyfriend/girlfriend regularly makes the difficult process of moving-on even more difficult. Teens become so distracted that their focus on academics may shift and they may begin to struggle with grades. And teens divert the hurt to a new boyfriend/girlfriend to lessen the pain, and do eye-catching PDAs to hurt their former boyfriend/girlfriend. â€Å"Pain is nature’s way of saying that something was wrong. Pain is therefore our best teacher. Let’s learn from this. Do understand that everything in life doesn’t last forever. Some things will fail, in spite of our best efforts. Look at the other significant relationships in your personal life (siblings, parents, friends, colleagues). Try to enhance these, because some of these may have been neglected when you were high on love.† [] 2. Young adult relationships How young is â€Å"too young† to start a relationship? It depends on the individual’s level of maturity, goals, and beliefs. Very much often the younger we are, the less mature we are due to a lack of life experience. When we are just beginning to figure out who we are, we may not be firmly grounded enough spirituality to form solid romantic attachments, and become more prone to making unwise decisions that can leave us with emotional, physical, psychlogical, and spiritual damage. Being in a relationship puts one in almost constant temptation, especially as emotions begin to develop and the attraction to that person deepens. Young teens (even older teens) are besieged by harmnal and societal pressures that seem at times almost unbearable. Such early relationships make more difficult to avoid damage to the delicate and still-forming self-image, not to mention the problem of resisting temptation. So developing a mutual relation in this age is very hard because temptation to the opposite sex is something like lust. So couples must be cautious of their PDA because PDA tends to be a â€Å"temptation starter†. 3. Adult (Mature) relationships Relationships come in many shapes and sizes, but all of them require maturity to create a lasting emotional bond. Starting a relationship is the easy part, but making it last requires patience and understanding. Learning to overlook mistakes and to look forward into the future are the key elements of a mature relationship. â€Å"Most people think of love as a feeling but love is not much a feeling as a way of being present. It is a kind of being in love with â€Å"love† to discover one’s self. PDA in this relationship is much more understandable and is a first step to mutual relation.† [] C. Third parties A third party is the involvement of a single person to a couple intimately and romantically. Being in a third party is really bad, as if you’re wrecking a relationship. What if you’re on the shoes of the person being cheated on, how would you feel? We also have what we call â€Å"Karma†. Some clever people say that being a third party is also a good thing to make the couple realize that they’re not meant for each other. It’s better if you commit a person who’s not taken, yet just to things legal. PDA is like a law of motion, if there’s any action, there’s equal and opposite reaction. The equal reaction is having a mutual relation while the opposite means break-up. D. Break – up A relationship break-up, simply referred to as breakup, is the termination of a usually intimate relationship by any means other than death. The term is less likely to be applied to a married couple, where a break-up is typically called a separation or divorce. Being in a break-up means the love has gone, died. This means that when you do PDA, your partner is never happy of what you two do and his/her feelings’ filled with no other but lust. The other thinks that his/her love is empty love so he/she decides to end it because the relationship is worthless. It isn’t right to continue. â€Å"After a break-up has passed understand the pain. Do not get into revenge mode, what’s done is done. Do not blame yourself for what has happened. Then, refocus on your life. Look at all the things in your life that you had not focused on while you were in a relationship. Revisit your goals and dreams. Lastly is to celebrate life.† [] E. PDA Interactions Doing PDA means interaction with your partner. This interaction means love. Love emerges from the crisis of intimacy versus isolation, a mature devotion that overcomes basic differences between men and women. To love means to care, to recognize the essential humanity of the other person, to have an active regard for the person’s development. But there are also issues involving PDA. These are issues about private space exposing one’s body on sexual areas to a another person and feeling about trusting another to accept one’s body. PDA is not just the objectivity of the act but is also for the sake of the doer. Public displays of affection are par for the course in every relationship someone is in, so it’s worth learning the rules. Granted, every woman and every relationship is different and will need some fine tuning, but the general limits of what is acceptable and what isn’t will be constant across the board. 1. Acceptable a. Holding hands Two or more people voluntarily hold hands for the purpose of expressing love or to enjoy physical intimacy. In PDA holding hands is a sign to a couple that they are connected to each other for they are in-love. It is the most common form of PDA and it is an acceptable form of affection and considered moral and ethical. Holding hands is the act of grabbing a girlfriend/boyfriend’s hand in public, whether to lead that person in the right direction or just to feel close to the person, and it is just fine in about any setting. It isn’t intimate enough to make the people around the couple squeamish, but it is intimate enough to let someone’s partner see it as a sign of affection and a declaration of two people’s status as a couple. b. Kissing A kiss is the act of pressing one’s lips against the lips or other body parts of another. Cultural connotations of kissing vary widely. A kiss may be used to express sentiments of love, passion, affection, respect, greeting, friendship, and good luck, among many others. The act of kissing has become a common expression of affection among many cultures worldwide. As a greeting, kissing is most definitely on the â€Å"acceptable† list and is fairly standard in most relationships. Obviously, this extends to personal social situations, and can be bypassed in professional arenas. To keep kisses acceptable, keep them brief and abstain from continued tongue action throughout the course of an outing. c. Hugging A hug is a form of physical intimacy, not necessarily sexual, that usually involves closing or holding the arms around another person or group of persons. The hug is one of the most common human signs of love and affection, along with kissing, unlike some other forms of physical intimacy. Cuddling seems to be an all right option. It gives the closeness that makes the couple feel good without offending too many people around. There are always those who frown on any contact between couples beyond an escort-like arm to a function. But having an arm about another and snuggling close is all right. Cuddling or hugging is harmless and less annoying than other displays of affection.